Friday, August 10, 2012

Even More Hobbit Disappointment

Don't try and explain yourself. I'm pretty sure we're done.
So, on top of doing away with miniature photography, on top of the insanity of it now being a Hobbit Trilogy!, this list of companion figurines from Games Workshop contains quite a few SPOILERS as to the specific characters and contents in these clearly misguided movies. Here are a few of the highlights:

Drogo Baggins (Frodo's father) and the Tavern Maid
Dís, Mother of Kili and Fili
Gimli (Stubble) (More Gimli comic relief, I take it, 'cause that totally does justice to the character.)

Grinnah & Mirkwood Werewolves ('Cause wargs weren't enough, I guess.)
The Werebeast
The Willowhags
Bloodwraiths
The Necromancer / Flesh Avatar
Narzug & Orc Summoner Coven
Tomb Wights
Mounted Tomb Wights
Saruman & The Ringwraiths
Vampire Bat Swarms
Galadriel (Water Steed)
Radagast’s Chariot / Spellfire Cart
Fire-wyrms (more dragons, great)
Braga & Goldscale Worshippers (some kind of dragon cult??)
Venomblade Assassin
Goldscale Priest (I guess so.)
Bofur on Cold-Drake (Yes, apparently Bofur will be riding a dragon.)
Dragon Thrall (whatever that is)
Fell Hatchlings
The Beornings (even though they didn't exist at the time of The Hobbit)
Turin, The Dragonslayer (as in the Turin Turambar from The Silmarillion, 'cause that makes sense.)

And, finally, this cryptic and very disconcerting heading:

Galadriel (Barrel)

I vow to you now, if Peter Jackson puts Galadriel in a barrel I'm walking out of the theater.